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Author Topic:   A dark story called "Your Worst Enemy"
PhantomPH
unregistered
posted 07-22-2003 06:59 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This one folks is a bit dark. Very violent. Take caution reading this one. I only got this done so sar. Let me now what you think and i may decide to finish it.

Your Worst Enemy
By Philip Lee

Settings: Tirck Lot Base
This is a base full of airplanes, buildings, cars, and the like. It is the night and the moon shines brilliantly over the base, making a glow go over the entire thing. We see a shadow moving over the ground behind the base fence. The shadow does a flip in the air, and jumps over the fence very silently. It then proceeds to one of the buildings. It looks in the window before entering. A guard is sleeping in his chair, not looking at the tv screens that’s connected to the surveillance cameras. The shadow creeps in, takes a knife and slits the guard’s throat. The guard starts choking, and grabs his neck as the blood flows out. He then starts squirming all over the floor then dies. The shadow then goes out of the building and proceeds to the heart of the base. The building that is marked “experiments”.

Settings: Building “Experiments”.
We see the shadow creep through the hallways, dodging guards left and right. He then un carefully bumps into one of the guards. Before he can move, The shadow knee kicks him in the stomach, then snaps his neck with his hands. The guard falls over...dead. The shadow continues his approach toward a room called “Experimental Room 1".

Shadow
(blunt)
This is the room.

The shadow takes out a pistol with a silencer then proceeds inside the room.

Settings: Experimental Room 1
This is a room filled with cages of horror. Dogs, cats, monkeys, you name it is horribly disfigured. The shadow shakes his head sadly then hides behind a table. A scientist is talking with another scientist but this one has a badge on his chest..

Scientist
(blunt)
We are failing in each experiment we do. We can’t seem to change these animals into human like people.

Scientist With Badge
(stern)
Then go to operation disk. This is the only way we can change these *points to a dog with one leg* THINGS into what we want them to be.

Scientist
(urgent)
Don’t you think that’s a bit rough? Who knows what kind of things could happen in that operation?! Its illegal what we are doing and you know what? I want no part of it!

The scientist with the badge smiles smugly.

Scientist With Badge
(smug)
And tell your family you no longer have a job and can’t support them? What will your wife think? She might leave you again for all we know. You don’t want that do you?

Scientist
(defiant)
No, but I’m not going to harm any more animals! As for as I’m concerned, I want to part of this!

As the scientist leaves, The one with the badge takes out a silenced pistol and shoots him in the head. He falls to the ground dead. Then the Shadow in anger, comes out of hiding and points his pistol at the scientist with badge.

Shadow
(blunt)
How could you do that? And what the hell are you doing with these things? If anything I need to get that disk! I need it to try my own “experiments”.

The shadow is now seen in the light and he is a male German Shepard cano-sapien. The scientist gasps.

Scientist
(shocked)
Your...one of the human dogs! Yes! It is possible! All this time and I thought it couldn’t be done! Well...um...Im afraid that disk is only for personnel only. We can’t let some stranger come in and take it now can we?

The dog smiles in a twisted way and shoots the scientist straight in the chest and he goes flying over a table right into a chair. He is dead. The dog starts searching around looking for the disk and finally found it. He kisses it and proceeds to leave the room but then sees guards running his way shooting at him. He dodges the shoots and shoots back, nabbing one in the chest. He shoots another in the head, then escapes from the building. He jumps over the fence and runs out into the night.


IP: 152.163.253.103

Mirka
Recruit 

Posts: 16
Registered: Jul 2003

posted 07-22-2003 08:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mirka     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Good storie....I like it...I want to read more..Are you going to post the second part?
(please do it)....=}

IP: 200.45.230.158

PhantomPH
unregistered 
posted 07-22-2003 08:05 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
im working on more of it right now as a matter of fact. thank you.

IP: 152.163.253.103

PhantomPH
unregistered 
posted 07-22-2003 09:16 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Here is more!

Settings: Road Rovers Rec Room.
This is a room with a tv and a couch facing the tv in the center. There are also arcades in the back of the room, and a pool table in the corner. On the couch the overs are sitting there. Including Tun and Vicky. They watching tv.

Tun
(bored)
Jeez,if we can’t find one decent channel then im going to scream!

Hunter stares at Tun.

Hunter
(blunt)
Then scream.

Tun stares at Hunter with a sarcastic look. Hunter sneers at Tun and turns his attention back to the tv. Colleen looks annoyed.

Colleen
(annoyed)
Will you two blokes quit it? You two been at each other’s throats ever since-

Suddenly the master speaks through a speaker that’s near the ceiling of the room.

Master
(blunt)
All Rovers, come to the Mission Control center now.

The Rovers rush out of the room.

Settings: Road Rovers Mission Control
We see a huge table near the center of the room with chairs all around it. A big gigantic tv screen is in front of the tv screen as well. The Rovers rush in to see the master.

Master
(blunt)
We have a lead on something.

Hunter/Tun
(blunt)
On what?

Hunter and Tun look at each other sternly. The Master shakes his head.

Master
(shaking)
Right. Well The Tirck Base was broken into last night and a cano-sapien stole a very importent disk. We have a lead on where he might be from an unknown source. But I may have an idea who that source might be.

Exile

(blunt)
Well who is this comrade?

Master
(explaining)
Well I used to have a fellow cano-sapien just like you guys work for me, fighting for justice. But after seeing his wife murdered in front of his eyes by Parvo, he soon quit. But he never said we wouldn’t stop helping me through time and time. So I think its him giving us the lead. His name was Tike.

Vicky
(concerned)
That’s awful. I don’t know what I would do if I lost my Blitzie!

She goes over to Blitz and wraps her arms around him. He smiles at her. Exile rolls his eyes.

Exile
(sarcastic)
Get room!

Blitz growls at Exile. Exile just smiles at him. The Master shakes his head again.

Master
(annoyed)
Well anyway Here is your coordinates. Go get em Rovers!

The Master walks over to Hunter and gives him a paper. Hunter looks at it and then turns toward the other rovers.

Hunter
(blunt)
We are dogs with a mission! We are dogs with a cause. We are..THE ROAD ROVERS!

All rovers
(howling)
ARRROOOOOOOOOO!

Settings: Road Rovers Jet.
We see the Rover jet flying in the sky, flying through the clouds at alarming speed. Inside we see chairs and windows on each side of the jet, and the cockpit is of course in the front. All the Rovers are sitting on each seat while Hunter flies the plane.

Hunter
(blunt)
We are almost there guys. Si t tight alright? Hey...that rhymed!

The other rovers rolled their eyes and laughed. Hunter simply shrugged his shoulders and kept flying the plane. They soon landed into an old worn out base.

Settings: Old Base.
It looks deserted here. We see old buildings in one corner, an air field across from the buildings, and a huge building to the left of the other buildings. The Rover Jet lands to the ground. The rovers climb out. They scout the area.

Hunter
(blunt)
Well lookie here. No one home. Well I can’t imagine that cano-sapien hiding around here.

Colleen
(blunt)
Yea me neither. But I have a blooming bad feeling about this. A very bad feeling that’s stuck in my gut.

Tun puts an arm around Colleen and she smiles at him. Hunter shoots a jealous look at the both of them and growls slightly under his breath. Anyway, they continue toward one of the buildings. They take out their blasters (guns that shoot plasma beams) and they go inside.

Settings: Old Building
They enter, the light coming from outside reflecting the hallway. It lights up the hallway ahead of them. They walk down it, looking into old, torn down rooms that looked like they used often. They then proceed to a room called “Torture Chamber”. They gulp but head inside.

Settings: Torture Chamber.
There is an awful smell lingering in this room. The walls are smeared with old, dried out blood and they rovers look disgusted. They walk down some stairs and gasp. Skeletons are everywhere, some with the skin still on them. Colleen screams.

Colleen
(scared)
Ok! I want out of here! RIGHT NOW!

The Rovers scramble out of the room but don’t get far when the cano-sapien from the beginning steps out of the shadows in front of them with a assault rifle in his hands. He points it at the rovers before they could point their blasters at him. Then some more cano-sapiens come out. Only there is a variety of them. There are foxes, wolves, and even turtles! They all point their guns at the rovers. The Rovers surrender.

IP: 152.163.253.103

Mirka
Recruit 

Posts: 16
Registered: Jul 2003

posted 07-22-2003 10:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mirka     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You're a great writer....please don't do these to me ...I really want to know how this is going to end ...
I think that Tun and Colleen make a good couple...but you need a new character to be Hunter girlfriend and make Colleen jealous...
whit that you can make an other storie....
=P

IP: 200.45.230.158

PhantomPH
unregistered 
posted 07-22-2003 10:55 PM           Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
yea. thank you. *humbly bows*. i plan to have it finished by tomorrow. look for it by then. it should be finished. again, thank you. your the only good critic i had with my stories. im trying to take a new step with my writing, to make it a bit darker. but anyays, thank you.

IP: 205.188.208.166

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